Day 276 - Grunting, Grimacing & Goldings!

So my Saturday morning comprised of a snow flurry, bacon baguette and latte in Côte and searching for dessert plates/dishes for my upcoming meals....with no success!  

I then ventured home to catch up on the Williams v Sharapova final clash, and it didn't disappoint!  The number 1& 2 seeds giving everything....a great match with such hunger and determination.  It had everything - illness, a rain delay and of course the trademark Shazza grunting!  Just saw a comment on Facebook saying Serena is an "unpleasant sportswoman"...in my opinion what a load of  bo!!ocks! Give credit where credit is due, not everybody's cup of tea but appreciate the amazing athlete she is!  Why do people have such a negative attitude when it comes to the William's sisters? I love them - their story, their personalities, their commitment to the sport.....Come on Serena, hoping you can do the Grand Slam!  Now Djokovic is another story completely.....grrrr!!!

Then it was time for the gym.....managed 30 minutes on the treadmill and TRXed hard, and Mrs Piper would be so proud of me pummelling my Glute Maximus with the roller! Oh the pain....

And to end the last day of January we headed to the Goldings and had a delightful evening - tasty food, great company and Chloe and Riley are just the most lovely kids.....I was pleased Nat came along as these kids like to play and I'm not as young as I used to be!!!  

Right off to bed as I have a 9 o'clock date with DavAnne, Nat, Bacon Sarnie and a certain Mr Andrew Murray!  Gonna be emotional. 

Day 275 - Dracula & Djokovic & DavAnne

Yeah its Friday - TGIF, TGIF, TGIF

This morning in my inbox this email made me chuckle, especially as we are an INDIAN specialist and haven't considered a sideline in Romania!!  But thank you Alexandra Nedelcu (Product Manager of Karpaten Turism) for the offer - "Trip to Transylvania - a 9 day bus tour"....couldn't think of anything worse, 9 days on a bus trip trying to hunt down Dracula.  Knowing my luck I would most probably find him, in some creepy Medieval Crypt!!

To follow that I endured on my I-pad, (gotta love Sky Go) Djokovic v Wawrinka's Australian Open Semi Final.  Got excited when "Stan The Man" leveled at 2 sets all.....that moment of happiness was short lived as the annoying and arrogant Djokovic won 6:0 in the fifth set to set up a final clash with Murray!  Come on Muzza, please do not let that frustrating player/coach combo of Djokovic/Becker get a Grand Slam!!

You know when someone just puts your back up, makes you frown and causes a tyraid of expletives to erupt???  Well, that is how I react when Djokovic is on court, just ask Natalie or more recent witnesses....my bosses, but they're cool - they dislike him as well!!

And for my 3rd and final alliterational (is that a word) D!!!

Don't worry I haven't spent my Friday night with a Transvestite called DavAnne but as I needed a D...why not merge the delightful Dave and Anne.  So busy are these two jet-setting social butterflies that this date was booked a few weeks ago - because life without Smellie/Maher is a life less enjoyable!!

Lovely evening at St John's Yard with DavAnne, the Punter-Stones and the Bagley-Kings...and an unexpecting sighting of Solange and Shan!  We discussed wedding readings, tennis and the Oscar winners over the years....Mr Maher's brain is full of this kinda stuff.....got back to mid-90's and he still knew the winner of the best film!!! Genius....

Anyway, goodnight all....been a blast!

Day 274 - Thursday!!

Is it just me or is Thursday the worst day of the week?  

It's so close to the weekend (but feels so far), fast day, non-booze day and a double bill at the gym....yawn!!

So let's have a little interactive quiz - the following five words below are Thursday in different languages but which countries!??

1.  Jeudi

2.  Donnerstag

3.  Deardaoin 

4.  Fimmtudagur

5.  Huwebes

And don't use Google!  No cheating....

I suppose a little snow storm at home time made today a little more exciting!!!!

Bring on Friday, I need a beer!!

Day 273 - Happy Birthday Pips!!

HAPPY 40TH BIRTHDAY STEVE!!!

Here is a little trip down memory lane and some quotes that I hope you remember from our 40 year friendship:

 

"Fatty & thinny went to bed.

Fatty blew off & thinny was dead"

"One, two, three, four
Tell me what you want and nothing more, more, more......."

Lyrics:  Black Box - I Don't Know Anybody Else.

"I'm the one you have to pay!!"

Have a great time in Dublin and look forward to celebrating with you at Chapter 12.

Day 272 - Wedding Bells!!!

Got to love a bit of Art Deco!!

Last night just as I was getting spruced up for dancin' - the future Mr & Mrs King popped our wedding invite into the flat, how exciting!!

All made by Ellie's talented hands.

RSVP in the post already, will mine be the first to get back to Bagley Basecamp - oh and the crisp duck breast please!!

Right next stag do planning....

Day 271 - Confusion & Mayhem

So as tonight is Strictly Ballroom, my Monday Memory is linked to dance!!! This gem is from November 2013, the 90's do.....what a funny night that was and the costumes!!!!

As you can see from this shot I'm a natural mover (ha ha), doing my own unique Harry Potter inspired Tango - with my poor victim Monica Lewinsky (aka SPS).

Bless Dick, doesn't he look confused....forgotten where he is or trying to find Mrs Potato Head!!!?

My back has been in all sorts of discomfort over the last 48 hours, really struggled to get out of bed this morning!!!  All wonky, in a right old state - resembling Quasimodo.  So I vowed that tonight my Latin moves would have to be a little more restrained, subtle and less enthusiastic!!

Off I went to dancing, or should I call it healing dancing? As soon as I stepped onto the dance floor in my shiny munchkin dance shoes the back pains disappeared!!  Tonight I finally mastered the around the clock Waltz move....but I now want to learn the New York and Hockey Stick moves, onwards and upwards!!!  Really enjoying my Monday nights and so chuffed with my achievements so far.....and such a relief to have a pain free back again!!

Goodnight from Fred & Ginger!!

Day 270 - Introducing Cody & Going Wild

Meet Cody, my Auntie Norma's new puppy.  Three months old and she is so cute - can anyone tell us what type of dog breeds she is...we think we can see a bit of Staffie, but not sure what else??

On our walk she was still a bit nervous but did like Humphrey:

This afternoon went to see "Wild" at the cinema - a biographical film with Reese Witherspoon based on the 2012 memoir "Wild: From Lost to Found on the Pacific Crest Trail" by Cheryl Strayed.  After her life spirals out of control she grabs a rucksack and hikes the Pacific Crest Trail alone, one of America's longest and toughest trails.

It was really good and Reese was superb!  Oscar worthy, I would say so.....

Day 269 - Tree's Boutique Bistro

So. At Natalie's mince pice and mulled wine evening back in December I was given my second favourite Christmas present - sorry Gary, but my 'build your own boyfriend' - just pipped your invite to 'Tree's Boutique Bistro' as best present......but only just!! January is always the most depressing month of the year so to have something to look forward was so thoughtful.

On arrival at Tree's boutique bistro I was met with the most exquisite aroma.......and Gary wearing his shorts. In January.

The Punter-Stones soon arrived and we left chef Tree in the kitchen while we chewed the fat. The starter was served. Haddock, prawn and sweet potato chowder. OMG. I cannot begin to describe how delicious it was. We were all offered seconds, and we all partook!!

After a brief interlude chef presented the main course. Butternut squash and kale pasta with goats cheese and walnuts. At this point we were all arguing which of us was going to marry Gary Tree. I pointed out that Sarah and Emma were already married!!!!.....you heard it here folks, if I have anything to do with it you'll all be needing to buy a hat soon!!! If we thought the starter was good, the main was even better!!

We were all so stuffed that we decided to have a little break before pudding. What else to do but have a desert island disc moment. Sarah chose Abba's Dancing Queen. Muriel's wedding is one of her favourite films (and mine!!). I chose Freddie's send off song, Chris Barber's Petite Fluer and then it all went pear shaped. Emma chose one of my favourite tracks which sent Gary into utter meltdown. Don't ever mention Watership Down to anyone in their 40's.....it'll just bring back horrific memories (mine was having a tantrum cos I didn't want to go to the cinema to see a film about boats!!!!!!) We listened to about 10 seconds of Bright Eyes and that was enough!! Gary then lightened the mood by choosing Kylie's Got to be certain. Did you know that GaryTree walked the same street that Kylie did in the video? You do now!!!

Then ready for pudding we had a real treat in store. Rhubarb, yoghurt and clementine cake, with rhubarb and clementine coolie and vanilla ice-cream.

*Dribbles*

Well what can I say. Chef Tree just surpassed himself again. The food was amazing, the company brilliant and the banter fabulous. Thank you for the invite, and thank you for asking me to be guest blogger. It is an honour and I hope I've done you proud. Xxxxx

Day 268 - Ode for a Toad!!

To continue my bromance with Tree,

There's no place that I'd rather be,

Than a Thai flavoured nibble,

With a bloke who's gone wibble,

And a bottle of Singa or three.

It's quite clear for all folks to see, 

He's half the guy he used to be.

With his classes of spin,

And a regular gin,

It's no wonder he weighs four stone three.

So in summary let me say this,

Knowing Treebeard is heavenly bliss, 

With his decreasing waist,

And his shit music taste,

It's a friendship that I wouldn't miss!! 

Day 267 - Bad has Broken me!!!

So is Breaking Bad as good as all the hype?

Yes it is....

It did take me awhile to get into it and some episodes can be a bit slow - but I love the characters, the relationships and the genius of the unlikely hero Walt - actually can you call a Crystal Meth Cook a hero??  No, I probably shouldn't!!!

I am well and truly hooked - and I am whizzing through Season 3, only a few episodes to go!

Even managed to get through the random "fly" episode last night - for those that have no idea what I am rattling on about it was a 45 minute episode set in a drug making factory focusing on a pesky fly - very slow but it did have a bit of a bonding story I suppose!!  Did the blue-bottle survive??....no spoilers here.

Right, goodnight folks - one episode before bed!!!!

Day 266 - It's only 4%!!!!

I know I said my New Year's resolution was no midweek drinking but as I can already sense a traumatic double bill of Silent Witness - I have caved in.

But do you really class a bottle of M&S Bucks Fizz as alcohol - it is 4%???

 

Day 265 - A Day At KC

So here is a day in the life of Tree at Kerala Connections.

I always plan to leave home at 8:15 to beat the craziness of the Pembury Road traffic but usually I end up leaving late – caused by a variety of reasons…leisurely breakfast of scrambled eggs, catching up with Eastenders, OCD over electrics and oven or just not being able to crawl out of my pit when the alarm goes off!!

But I always arrive in time to make the morning coffee, no instant at KC but a proper posh cafetiere!  This morning we had a blend that came from a region in Kerala – and very smooth it was!

 

Off I go with the tray of drinks up two flights of stairs to the attic office and start up the computers and turn the phone on.  Shortly followed by Di and Trev who have to change out of their dog walking clothes…..but some mornings they decide against a change of wardrobe!! Their house, their rules...

30 emails today (pretty average) with a ratio of 60% customer emails and 40% utter crap – do I want a departure to Tashkent on the 3rd of February????...not this week, but thank you for the offer!!

It is now 10:00 and all the quotes have been sent to India for my agent to work on and all the annoying customer questions answered – relating to money, alcohol, collection details and mosquito nets!  But frustratingly most of this is explained in the client’s paperwork – READ YOUR DOCUMENTATION YOU WEIRDOS!!!!  Back shortly, I've drunk a pint of water and a coffee already…..

Just got off the phone to a dear old lady, wanting three weeks in South India with train travel – what she also needs is to stop over talking me and listen to my words of wisdom.  She has driven me to drink…off I go for the 11 o’clock coffee run!

Look at the obstacle I have to overcome with a full coffee tray!!!

I’ve got really weird clients today……a family with just 3 days to do the Golden Triangle…..give me strength!!!  Ok, if you wanna do it, crazy fools!!  Also some travel agent who is totally loopy, keeps ringing me with stupid questions, keep calm Tree…keep calm and breath.

Pretty busy today, already emailed three customer quotes off – and my inbox has still got four others to tidy up and send off but before that I need my salad and sun bites!!  Off down to the freezer…always quite fresh downstairs!

Lunch doesn’t alter much – Di & Trev at 12:30 and I often slope off at 13:45(ish) – no Starbucks or Nero for me but a comfy sofa, lunch on lap and catch-up TV!!

After lunches, Zigi gets a phone call from the neighbour Dorothy for his afternoon stroll – he always comes back muddy, luckily my job description doesn’t include cleaning Vallhunds!

On the cusp of 4pm – which means it is tea time…as we are not fasting I wonder if we will get some of Trevor’s delicious Christmas cake, I do hope so!!

Result……

This blog makes it sounds like I just drink and eat all day.......but amongst those moments I have been flat out, in my afternoon session I emailed 2 client quotes and 2 agents quotes - and all with just a few minutes to spare before the clock showed 5:30.  

Right I'm outta here - soup night at the Trees followed by Pilates!!  That's all from Horsmonden, night!

Day 264 - Goodbye My Friend.

Oh we never know where life will take us
I know it's just a ride on the wheel
And we never know when death will shake us
And we wonder how it will feel

So goodbye my friend
I know I'll never see you again
But the time together through all the years
Will take away these tears
It's okay now
Goodbye my friend

I've seen a lot things that make me crazy
And I guess I held on to you
We could've run away and left well maybe
But it wasn't time and we both knew

So goodbye my friend
I know I'll never see you again
But the love you gave me through all the years
Will take away these tears
I'm okay now
Goodbye my friend

Life's so fragile and love's so pure
We can't hold on but we try
We watch how quickly it disappears
And we never know why

But I'm okay now
Goodbye my friend
You can go now
Goodbye my friend

Linda Ronstadt - "Goodbye My Friend"

Day 263 - Address to a Haggis!!

Didn't realise you could have so much fun with an After Eight Mint and a microphone!!

Last night Nat, Dan and myself ventured over to Detling for a catch up with Andrea (aka Murphy), Paul (aka Mr Scotland) and Malcolm.

As it is Burns Night next weekend and two of the party have Scottish heritage the feast prepared was a Burns supper - starting with a delicious hearty broth.  Then Malcolm addressed the haggis, a rhyming poem to announce the savoury pudding's arrival to the dining table:

"Fair fa' your honest, sonsie face,
Great chieftain o the puddin'-race!
Aboon them a' ye tak your place,
Painch, tripe, or thairm:
Weel are ye worthy o' a grace
As lang's my arm."

And so on.....and do you know what Haggis ain't all that bad considering whats blitzed up in it!!  The food was delicious with a medley of delights to compliment the Scottish sausage including mackerel, neeps and tatties.  

Finished off with a tasty Cranachan and of course washed down with a few glasses (bottles) of Vino.

Then the fun and games began:

So take an After Eight Mint - put it on your forehead and try to navigate it down your face to your mouth without the help of hands!!!  Sounds random but so funny and a tad messy - as you can see:

And to finish off a great evening how about some dramatic lip synching with a microphone, as you do!! 

Oh and a fantastic dance routine to Super Trouper, by the one and only Ms Agnetha Harris!

Also if you are at a loose end try keeping in time to Nicki Minaj's rap in Bang Bang - I tried last night (or early this morning) to no avail....!!

"It's Myx Moscato
It's frizz in a bottle
It's Nicki full throttle
It's oh, oh"

Thanks Detling Duo for a fab night :-)

Day 262 - Small Feet, Small....

.....Shoes!!

So here is the shoe blog, I bet you have been so excited to read it!!! Yeah right...

Yesterday a parcel arrived at work from Hong Kong, and inside were a pair of black shiny dance shoes with felt bottoms.  I ordered a UK size 7.5 and when I opened the box I got a shock, they looked tiny and more suitable for a munchkin. I have small feet but there was no way these were going to fit!!

But size is deceptive and they did fit, snug mind you but they will do nicely!! Come on Waltz, Tree is ready!!!!

Day 262's blog is dedicated to Fred.  G x

Day 261 - Good Girl, Good Grief!!

Happy Friday Night everyone!!!

I was writing my blog about shoes but as I was typing away "Good Girl" by Carrie Underwood came on....hearing that tune Nat whizzed into the lounge like some out of control tornado!!

Scarily that was without any alcoholic influence.....if you are in the St John's region of Tunbridge Wells tonight beware !!

Day 260 - Who Sulks Best?

What can I say about today...........? Nothing!!! 

So I will leave you with these images from Saturday night, who makes the better sulker!!!!????

Day 259 - Wonder of the Onesie!!!

So here we are again - Silent Witness Wednesday! "Terror on the tube" and terror on the sofa....

Nat always said she didn't want a onesie, so what did I go get her for Christmas......she loves it really!! It's not just any onesie, it's an M&S onesie. 

Day 258 - Fast Spinning Dancing!!!!

Monday nights are just insane at the moment - but insanely enjoyable.  But come Tuesday morning my fasting, spinning and dancing combo turns me into a zombie.

Rushed home from work and spun like a loon with Sarah who is a great teacher, she takes no prisoners and doesn't let us pause for breath!!!  Last night I was right in her eye-line (big mistake) - couldn't falter as she kept shouting "come on Gary!!"..... and when she said "faster" I really shouldn't have rolled my eyes!!!!

Then it is off to Bells Yew Green's Village Hall for the 2 hour ballroom lesson with Keith and Jemima.....and Cinderella!!

Jemima lent Caroline some glitzy dance shoes to practice in, and I just loved the look with the leopard print socks :-)  My dance shoes are winging their way from Hong Kong as I write this, when they finally get here I'm hoping they can transform me into the new Brendon Cole!

The fancy shoes made Caroline taller, which meant I had to really work on my posture as I couldn't have Cazza towering over me....but my problem is I cant stop my head dropping and I keep watching my feet!  Head up Tree, head up...

Who knew the Waltz was so complicated, the around the clock move was frustrating and there is a Japanese Tango??

Day 257 - Needs a caption!!

It's Monday Memories time again - this week I am heading back to the USA.  Three months ago today was the eve of the #GMT40 trip.  Last night as I struggled to get to sleep (again) I skimmed through my timeline on Facebook and found some unseen footage from Vegas.  I reckon I missed them due to the lack of free Wi-Fi and the madness that erupted when we arrived.

Right, this photo, cracks me up - come on people lets have a humourous caption please!!

And here are some other moments from the High Roller, my Birthday and the Grinham's Elvis renewal of vows.... 

Also what the hell am I doing on the High Roller.....auditioning for Riverdance!!!? Watch out Michael Flately!

Photo credits Punter-Stones & Solange!!!